My Lil bundle if joy!!!

So last year in June I found out I was expecting I was nervous but yet excited. I worked my while pregnancy until I got induced to have my Lil one. He came into this world on January 23,2013 he was born at 12:55p.m. I was 39 weeks pregnant when I had him. He was born perfectly healthy.I had an epidural but it didn't take affect till after he was born without anything in his system. He is 2 months old today.I would not trade him for anything in this world. :)

Job unfair

Well had a job that i liked. It was at a daycare, but I wasn't getting the hours i need to pay my bills. So I had to go out and find another job and i did. Went to interview and got hired same day pretty excited. I will make a little more than I was at the daycare and i get benefits and a 401k I didn't get those things at the daycare. So now I'm hoping this job will work out. Plus its close to home so I can walk there and save gas. I just got to get use to being on my feet all day and not having my weekends off anymore. I'm going to miss the daycare so much. I love kids and love being around them. I'm going to miss them so much. I just have to do what's best for me. This already makes my third job and I just started working last year. My first job was treating my unfair and not giving me enough hours or benefits. An then the daycare had no benefits and cut my hours down. So I'm praying this one will last.

Disorders

A lot of people in this world has a disorder or several disorders. It is no fun at all to have a disorder. An some people that doesn't have a disorder still talks and makes fun of us who does have one. I have bipolar my bipolar just isn't so bad that i need meds yet for it. I hate having this disorder. I go through so many moods it's not funny an it sucks. An yet I still live my life with this an just ignore people who say something to me when they see my bipolar showing. It just makes me so mad that there are people out there that are like that. I work at a daycare so I see all ages of children an its sad how kids will make fun of other kids that have a disorder. I don't know why or what causes children or adults to do this but its very sad. An i think it needs to stop. How would they feel if they had a disorder an we made fun of them. Well I know they wouldn't feel very well about it.

New beginnings

Sorry I haven't been on here lately. Just been busy for awhile now. I was working at a KFC but I got tired of all the bs an began looking for a new job. An I found my new job an it only took a week after i put my application in to get hired. I got a job that I am happy with. My dream was to always work with children an now I get to have my dream job. I work at a daycare an I'm so happy with it. I'm glad I made the choice to quit the fast food business to go be with children. An also rite now it is difficult around my house because my boyfriend just got a job after three years of not working and being on unemployment and going to school. An he has started out at min. wage but it will go up just a a few dollars soon, but it's going to be hard at first with us both just making min. wage n having all the bills we have, but I know we can make it. We have made it through a lot of stuff since we have been together an it just makes us stronger. An it will be hard to get use to not getting to see or spend much time with him now that we both work, but like I said I know we can get through this. We will just have to plan to spend time together on days off we have together.

Family Issues

Family is people you care about and love. They don't have to be by blood. Family can be complicated. When a family problem comes up some people think they need to but in an be nosy to cause more problems. An that's something I just can't stand. I had a problem several days ago with my brother. He is 2 yeard younger than me an he just came back home from being over seas for almost a year. I got to spend 1 day with him n that was the day he arrived, which was a week ago. An i have been trying to get him to come an see me for a lil while but he can't bc his GIRLFRIEND suddenly has things come up when he plans on coming here. An he won't come here without her which I don't know why. Im still trying to figure that one out. Anyway me and my brother got into an argument because i told her how I felt about the situation and she told my brother that I called him something that I didn't. So he was ignoring me, but I finally got to speak to him, but he still hasn't came to spend time with me. He asked his GIRLFRIEND what they was doing next week because he was planning on coming here for a few days before they go to the beach. I just think that she needs to let me and my brother have some time to ourselves without her being everywhere he goes. It's like she don't trust him, which he is a person you can trust no matter what way you have a relationship with him is. Now her on the other hand can't and shouldn't be trusted.

Sometimes Life Isn't The Easiest!

Sometimes life can be hard, but there is days where life is easy. We also have scary moments in our life. Sometimes we get sick and don't know what is wrong and starts getting scared. Life comes with a lot of ups and downs, but all we have to do is take one day at a time. We have to try and take care of ourselves the best we know how. An sometimes we make mistakes in our lives an we have to learn to live with our mistakes. I know right now for me things are kinda stressful and plus its kinda scary right now. The scary part of my life hopefully will be over by next week as long as things go well. An as for the stressful part most of it should go way in 56 days because that's when my brother gets back from being over seas. I can't wait for him to be home. We go through a lot in our lives from the day we are born until the day we are gone.  All we can do is live our lives the best we can. We can't just sit in our house we have to get out an do things. Live life the way you want an not the way others want you to.

Losing Family

Why is that we lose some of our family? I have no clue on why we do but it does happen everyday. Whether its by a death or them leaving or them getting sent off. I am the oldest child in my family. With my mom i have four siblings and with my dad i have two more siblings. Living with my mother was not easy and still isn't easy for the three left there. Now living with my dad was easy but he needs to learn how to put his foot down an stop doing bad habbits in front of the kids because both of them were following his footsteps. One of my brothers that lived near my dad already got sent of to a home for misbehaved children. An the other one will probably be sent off too. An with my mother us kids didn't get a life an the ones at home still don't get one. I lived with her until one week before i turned sixteen. All the way up to that point i had to take care of the kids, clean the house, cook and anything else she wanted. One of my brothers is two years younger than me an he was the first one i had to take care of. I fed him and changed him and everything else at the age of two. An the other is kids very in age. One of them is 7 years younger than me, another is 8 years younger and the third is about 13 years younger than me. I had to take care of each and everyone one of them. Now that im older and i look back on it i really didnt mind it bc at least they got fed and bathed and homework done. An they were not left to defend for themselves. Now the one that is two years younger got sent of a couple yrs ago for several months bc my moms husband put her upto it. An after that he joined the army to get away from her. An now for the one that is eight years younger she prob will be sent off here soon. She is bipolar like me but she has adhd also. An she has gotton into alot of trouble but i say she is doing the stuff she is doing because of the way they treat her at home. An the one that is 13 years younger is acting out in school and some other stuff an i say thats also bc the way she gets treated at home. An the one that is 7 years younger so far has gotton in trouble at school besides falling alseep in class but hey theres alot of us that did that. So i have a feeling i will be losing another one  or maybe even two of my siblings and that will be a tolal of 4 if they both get sent off. An I know they never acted this way when i was still living at home because i was actually there for them when they needed me and when i left my brother that is 2 years younger took that responsibility until he left. I had to leave because i was going to get sent off too. An none of these things started to happen until my mother got with the guy she is married to. My mom always does whatever the guy she is with wants her to do. The guy that she is with comes first and its always been this way, but things was never this bad until she got with the one she is married too. I think she needs to leave his butt. So to say i don't want her to be with him i hate his guts and i don't want him in our lives he just needs to leave. Oh and another thing is when he first got with my mother he told her he doesn't like kids but yet she stays with him.

My hero, my soldier, my brother!

So i have a brother that's in the army an i miss him dearly. I actually have two brothers in the army. One is going through the traing now an the other is over seas. Im closer and always have been to the one over seas. I can't wait for him to come home. He suppose to be home in four months an i hope he does get to come home. I havent seen him since January because he got to come back from over seas for two weeks to visit the family. He didn't even get to come home for Christmas an that sucked really bad. I miss seeing him and i miss talking to him everyday. I get to see and talk to him once in awhile through skype. I just can't wait for him to get to come home. I have been counting down the days!!!! An for my other brother he is actually my step brother. An we haven't seen each other in years an we finally found each other last year n im so happy i found him again. I miss hanging out with him and it sucks we live so far apart. An he has a brother and sister he has never met and hopefully one day i will be able to let them meet each other. I am so proud of both of my brothers!!!! An I will always support them no matter what their decisions are!!

America!

What does being an American mean? I believe it means that we was born in the USA. An being an American we are suppose to have freedom. Well we do get that freedom to a point. There are some things we can speak our minds about and then there is things you cant speak your mind about because some people take it offensive. What is America? America is where we should have our freedom. To get our freedom men and women have to go fight for our country. They have to put their lives on the line for us to have freedom. An yet there is people out there that doesn't respect or thank those men and women. If it wasn't for them we wouldn't have our freedom. People need to realize who helps fight for their freedom.

Don't understand people at time!

I don't understand some people at times. Why would someone say stuff to hurt you purposely? I know that they know that they are saying things that are going to hurt, but yet they do it and don't apologize for it. They will say mean and hateful things to you and then when you get upset about what they say they get really angry and mad at you. I think its stupid that they get mad at you because you get upset over what they say. An they don't apologize and expect things to be fine and dandy. Well they need to realize that its not fine and dandy to say mean and hurtful things to you. Are they trying to shove you away and make you leave? I don't understand why they do this. I wish i knew what they are really thinking and i wish i knew what they really want. If they want you to leave then why don't they say it instead of beat around the bush.

Spring time

What is spring time? It is the time of year everyone can't wait for. When spring arrives you know winter is over and summer is coming soon. Spring time is when you hear the birds chirping bright and early. It's when you see the flowers starting to bloom in their bright and beutiful colors. Spring is also the time of year when you hear people mowing grass, that wonderful smell of grass is great in the spring time. Spring time is also the time for Easter. Of course many people beleive in Easter different than some people do. An spring time is the time when the weather starts to look and feel great. Got to love Spring!

THE WAY SOME PEOPLE HURT YOU!!

Why do some people like to say things that they know that will hurt you? I don't think some people really think before they say what they say. Like saying they don't want you to go to a concert because they are getting tired of paying for double of things you guys do together. It hurts so much to hear someone you love so much say that to you. I just can't believe that they would say such a thing know that you can't get a job very easily because of back problems. They except you to get a job still an you have tried for several years an stil no luck. An yet you go somewhere to think n cry n they come find you n ask you what's wrong well if they don't realize what they did to you than they got problems. An then they ask why are you crying what is your problem, like seriously figure it out. Then they ask you if your coming back out of  where you was. It's like they don't give a rat's ass what they did to you. An it's so hard to believe they would do that to you knowing how much you love them an you thought that they truely loved you. Well if they truely loved you like they say then they wouldn't say stuff to hurt you on purpose. I think people that supposedly love you need to stop an think of what they are getting ready to say before they say it!!!!

WHY DO SOME BOYFRIENDS DO WHAT THEY DO!

Why do some boyfriends do the things they do?Im sure they know its going to irrate u bt they do it anyway. Like tell you that they want you to go out of town so they can go to a concert. Why can't they ask if ya want to go. NO they don't want their girlfriends to experience anything new like that, they tink us woman should stay home or go to a family members house so they can have fun. Well those kind of guys piss me off. They need to understand that us woman would like to go and do stuff like that. When the guys don't ask us to go an just tell us o go to a friends house or a family members house makes it sound like they are planning to do something bad. So they need to stop an think before they tell us what they want to do or where they want to go.

Mom and Dad!!!!

How come when you are younger your parents don't want nothing to do with you? I have asked this question many times and I still don't have an answer. Now that i am grown up an almost 21 my mom and dad are trying to be a part of my life. It's something Im not use to an I don't know how to take it. My dad calls me alot in one day to check on me and my mom calls me on her days off of work or before she goes to work to check on me they have never cared before an now all of a suden they care. My dad has been coming to visit me when he can and my mom has been at my house like every weekend for awhile now. Its kinda scaring me that they both want so much to do with me now but didn't want anything to do with me when I was younger. My mom is going to come an spend my birthday with me an she never really celebrated my birthday when I was younger. An my dad is also wanting to come an take me somewhere for my birthday. I don't know what they are up to but it is really really scary. I am trying to give them both a second chance but after all they have put me through when I was younger its kinda hard to give them another chance.

Family Growing Apart!

How come over the years some family's grow apart? I don't know why we are growing apart, but I have a feeling of why we are growing apart. An I don't like losing my family because I love my family a lot an i don't want to lose my family. My brother is in the army an he came home for a two week visit last week an i got to spend like 2-3 days with him. An when he left to go to where his girlfriend an our mom lives I havent heard from him since besides once an he didn't want to talk long then. An I just wish he would talk to me more often but he won't. He was suppose to call me by today to let me know when he would be back this weekend to spend some more time with me, but he hasn't called. An me an my mom have grown apart over the years an i liked it when me an my mom was close an i wish we was close like we use to be. An then i have two half brothers who live about 2-3 hours away from me an we  have grown apart i call n check on them all the time n when i go down there for visits i try to see them but they dont want to see much anymore. I just wish me an my family could be close like we use to be. I know riends grow apart an that i can accept but i dont want to except my family growing apart from me. I love my family way to much an i dont want to lose them.

Sickness

Where does sickness come from?  Sickness can come from people or things that are around us. We also get sick when we aren't around sick people an it makes us wonder how we got sick. Like one day we wake up feeling fine an the next day we wake up sick an throwing up everywhere. Being sick is not a good feeling you just wish it would go away an never come back, but the truth is we are going to get sick throughout the rest of our lives. No one likes being sick but its something we got to live with. Migraines is considered a sickness an some people have to live with migraines for the rest of their lives. I'm one of those people who have to live the rest of my life with migraines an they are the worst thing ever. No matter what i do i cant get rid of it on my own. They get so bad that i have to go to the hospital to get shot so it can go away. Being sick is the worst thing anyone in the world could have. We can try everything to keep us from being sick, but no matter what we all will get sick some how some way an its just something we have to live with. Its part of life. There are so many illness's out there an some have cures an some don't. All I got to say about it is i would never wish my worst enemy to be sick. I know how it feels an i hate it so i would never wish it on anyone.

Weather

Why is the weather the way it is? One day its nice an warm out an the next day its cold and snowing. This is the kind of weather that makes everyone sick. The weather either need to stay warm or stay cold don't keep changing everyday. We are tired of getting sick because this darn weather don't know what it wants. When its spring then it need to kinda warm. An the summer needs to be hot and the fall needs to be chilly. An winter needs to be cold. We don't need confusing weather in our lives because it messes with peoples plans. An the weather people need to get it straight to. I believe that they guess what the weather is they don't try and estimate what it is going to be like.

Fathers or Dad

What is a father? Well a father is different than a dad. A father is someone that is there when you need them. A father is someone that will be in your life from the time your born until the day they are no longer here. Father's love to be around their kids an love to be there for them. What is a dad? A dad is someone that isn't there when you need them. A dad don't care much about their kids. Dad's come in an out of your life. A dad is never around because a dad don't want to give you the love you want and they just don't care what you do. I use to have a father an i have a dad. The person who was my father was my stepdad. He was there when i needed him. He made sure i was ok. He gave me love an he was always there. My stepdad was my father from the time i was 1995 until 2001. I still have a dad yes my real parent. He is not there much when i need him. He don't care for me like he does my brothers. My brothers come first in my dad's life. I do give my dad this he is trying to be there but i don't know what to do. He hasn't been there hardly ever for the past 20 years almost 21 years. I went through so much when my stepdad left. I needed my real parent there my dad i needed him to be a father but he wasn't. I just wish i could have my dad be my father but i think its too late to start trying.

Old friends trying to be friends again!!

Why do old friends keep trying to be your friend again? Can't old friends get the hint that you don't want to be friends again. I mean you and your old friend being really close and doing things together an then they stab you in the back for a stupid reason. An when they stab you in the back and don't get the hint that you don't care so they try to get everyone else to not be your friend anymore. This is how my last year in high school was in 2009. I met this girl and became friends with her and she gets pissed over something stupid so she tells my other best friend who i was friends with for 5 years that i am saying shit behind her back so she quit being my friend also. An they both just kept trying to get me pissed because they knew if i hit either one of them that i wasn't going to get to graduate on time and they knew that i would be going to jail bc i was over 18 n they wasn't. An now they both keep trying to be my friend and i won't be their friend bc i don't like people who stab me in the back over stupid shit. I just wish they both would get the hint. Im so sick of them bothering me. People who stab you in the back doesn't deserve a second chance.

The New Year So Far

Well we are in day two of the new year. My new year is going good so far. I have talked to brother on the 1st day of this new year and that made me so happy since he is so far away an I haven't seen him for months now. How is everyone else's new year going so far I wonder. I hear some people say this year has started off really bad so far. An I have heard some people say that this year has started out good so far. Some people wish it was still 2010, but if it stayed the same year all the time our lives would not be moving forward. Which means we would not be getting older which some people would like. I think this year is going to be a good one for me. I have so much to look forward to this year. Why is it every year people say they wish it was a different year. Its like these people aren't happy no matter what. I think they need to stop letting the negatives get in their way an start letting the positives in for once. We can't always think of what could have or should have we need to think for what is going to happen to us each day. We need to live our lives one day at a time. We need to not think of the past and not think of the future so much. That's whats hurting all of us.